Friday, December 28, 2012

That One Night in Bangkok

I bidded farewell to my companion and left for Central World. It was supposed to be named the World Trade Centre of Bangkok, but the name was changed because of the 911 incident. The mall may seemed like the Pavilion of Malaysia, but the Food Loft was nothing like Food Junction. The price might be the same, but it was of higher class. Wearing a basic pink chiffon top, a Dorothy Perkins jeans shorts and an Everlast slip on, I felt underdressed.

Carried on to the skywalk along the street, there was the Siam Square Street Fiesta, with various Thai street food. While I was walking alone on the street, I saw this beggar. A acid-disfigured man, with his head tilted up looking at passerbys who didn't seem to notice him. He had only one eye, and that eye was not even normal-looking because of the disfigurement.

Once a while, mom told me there was a syndicate who controlled them. They were caught from their country of origin, disfigured or amputated, given poor medical treatment, put on the street on the day and put in a cage in the night. Such an irony when they were placed right across Siam Paragon and those high-ended malls with those well-dressed and high class people hanged out, while across the street, there were people who suffered.

Toughen up and acted like a heartless passerby, I continued my journey to MBK Centre. What I realised was, Bangkok was not much a difference to Kuala Lumpur or Singapore. All were developed, with same kind of malls and brands, walk around with the same railway transit and taxi drivers who marked up fares for profit maximisation. Was there really no genuinity in this world? That one night in Bangkok should have lasted longer. That one night in Bangkok should have been more nights.

God have His plans for me. Overseeing the view of Millenium Hilton, Sheraton and Shangri-La, He showed me fireworks, to remind me of there was still a beautiful scene among the uglies. Upon the arrival in the homeland, He showed my rainbow, to restore my faith in a hopeless place. I am quite tired of falling down and picking myself up. If Sleeping Beauty has a choice, she would prefer if Prince Charming didn't kiss her and wake her up from her sweet dream.

P.S. I did have a sweet dream, do you really have a brother who look exactly like you?


Wen Xin

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Bittersweet

Never in my life I have failed an exam paper, this time however, I am prepared to fail. Amazed not, I am still relaxed despite not knowing 80% of my Economics syllabus. Received comments on 'hey you are Wen Xin, you will surely do well'. We will see. Nevertheless I am really prepared for post exam holidays and the apocalpse of 21st December.

I can't wait for my girls night, window shopping, end my movies draught, 3 consecutive hours of gym, Bangkok, 2012 reflection, and welcoming 2013. Honestly, ignore the remaining 15 days for 2012, I will have 4 months for my external exams. 4 months, sound really like a mission impossible.

Have one of the most outrageous idea on life just now. If it were to be done, it will be life changing for the next 5 years. It's either I risk it, ruin it or remain it. Maybe it is just the pre exam symptoms. Or talking to someone can make me sane.

Facebook fasting until end of exams. Or I might extend it until after Bangkok. Probably I should really stop catching up with people's exciting life when I have trouble catching up with my own lifeless life.

Had one of the sweetest dream, if only my dream can come true. At this point, probably I can't afford to have any disruption to my life anymore. The life is messy and lifeless enough. Perhaps it is time to move on. Perhaps I can just stay with some sweetness in the bitter.

Love,
Wen Xin

Friday, December 14, 2012

Myself in Two Six

If I were to sum up myself in the 26 alphabets,

Anomie
Learn this word from Emile Durkheim, describing one as normless. I regard myself as different from others, refuting the society's usual norms.

Boring
Comparing my life to others, it is pretty much boring in other people eyes. I don't think it is exciting, but I do think it is fulfilling.

Considerate
A principle I hold, if only each person can be a lil considerate to others, there will be much less problems, nuisance, hassle in this world.

Dead
Somehow, things feel as if it is dead and gone. Dead is the spirit, gone is the will.

Emotional
Humans are all emotional, it depends on how well you hide it.

Fcuked up
Probably my first vulgar word in public. It is the first word I can think of to sum up my life.

Gorgeous
Can't think of others other than this perfect word. Lol. I am not blessed with a gorgeous face, but I do think I have managed to stay classy and appropriate.

Harmony
Something I wish but can't be happening.

Ironic
A & N are ironically opposite. G is a lie. M and N is contradicting too.

Judgemental
Can't help me but to judge things and people, it is where observation comes and I judge their lives, their doings, hoping to learn from them.

Kerr, Miranda
Can't think of any words for K. Wife of Orlando Bloom, hot mom of the cutest celebrity baby and model of lingerie powerhouse Victoria Secret, Miranda Kerr is my second fitspiration I am looking up to. Not sure how her real person is, but she has demonstarted class and elegance, and a body to-die-for.

Lazy
If procrasti-nation is a nation, I am the queen.

Materialistic
Something I am arguing with, with myself lately.

Normal
I just want to be normal.

Organised
Extremely particular in achieving orders, maximising efficieny.

Philosophical
Through Sociology, was able to learn to think about society and life philosophically.

Quirk
Pretty sure people do find me being quirky sometimes, sorry I can't control myself at times to be a good figure all the time.

Realisitc
Anti optimist, anti pessimist. Somewhere in the middle of both, there comes a view.

Stubborn
The ego in me, is bigger than I thought.

Toned
My gym routine, has helped me to stay healthy and feel good.

University
Didn't turn out as I thought. Nevertheless, a process I am glad I am going through.

Volunteerism
A serving art which burns brightly.

Whisky
My alpha numeric code.

X-Ray
My alpha numeric code.

YOLO
Pretty cliche word. But yes, you only live once.

Zombie
Typing this in dark, again. Insomnia again. Zombie-look for tomorrow, again.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

12.12.12, 12.12am

Alright, at 08.08.08, 8.08pm, I watched the China Olympics 2008 opening ceremony. On 12.12.12, 12.12am, I witnessed in my own eyes, a historical moment. Not only it was a milestone for my team, it was a proud moment of me, being the youngest and the stupidest to be part of the history.

My mid terms is scheduled in 6 days, finishing in 8 days. The world is rumoured to end in 9 days. My Bangkok trip with my family is in 11 days. The year is definitely ending in 19 days. December is always the reflective month. I can't wait for the 2012 reflection and the 2013 resolution, which of course, it is my tradition to post it here.

20 years, 6 months, 4 days old, am I ready to be handed my silver key next year?


Love,
Wen Xin

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Foodstagram & Facefood

Embracing the Asian culture, capturing images of food has becoming a social norm in the Malaysian youth. When a waiter presents you the perfect-cooked and well-decorated meal, the ever-ready smartphone is there to take a picture. It is like a prayer before eating. When I asked, done? I started my meal and my friends uploaded their photos to Facebook or Instagram instantly with the 3G or WIFI.

Funny, I feel like Instagram has become Foodstagram and Facebook has become Facefood, or Foodbook, whichever you prefer. Users shared their virtual meals online, often garners likes and comments. It has done the dining place a huge favour of free marketing promotion. In return, it promotes the culture of dining in places which offer Foodstagram/Facefood-quality fod where price is not that reasonable or affordable to majority.

Youth these days are moving towards materialistic capitalism, thanks Karl Marx for the big word. They are spending at about MYR20 for a good meal and having Starbucks as yum-cha session. A Starbucks barista has to work 4 hours for a MYR20 meal and 2.5 hours for a cup of Starbucks. Erm, wait, a Starbucks barista is entitled for unlimited Starbucks by the way. A basic blue collar foreign worker is getting MYR26 for a day. And my Sociology tutor thinks that McDonalds McValue meal of MYR6 is expensive.

Unfortunately, Foodstagram and Facefood have promoted better dining among youth. Sharing is the main idea of Foodstagram and Facefood, there is element of showing off indirectly. It shows your status and your personality. Me myself, somehow addicted to Facebook, God I don't know why. It is a media for me to catch up with friends and to share my humble views in forms of quotes, never a site for emotional letdown or backlash war. Blog is my personal site where I complain (occasionally) and publish my rather bad articles.

I was close to create a Twitter account. And I look at pictures of Candice Swanepoel everyday on Tumblr. She is hot. Facebook shall stay as my sole addiction. Perhaps the reason why I am sick of eating meat is, the excessive sharing of meat on my Facefood newsfood.


Love,
Wen Xin

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Semi-Vegan

It was 12.21am, and I was going to have a replacement class on a Saturday morning, supposingly to be waking up in 6 hours.

I met up expectedly with an old friend today and we engaged on a conversation on the topic of vegetarian. I changed my diet to semi-vegetarian in end of April. First question to be asked, what is semi vegetarian? It is where someone adopts a heavily vegetables-based diet. In my case, I only consume meat at most twice a week, usually during special or family dinner.

Second question to be asked, WHY on earth would you choose to be a vegetarian? Isn't it torturing? At each time, the voice inside me are asking back WHY on earth do you want to be a slave to the labour market, sacrificing 15 hours a day on travelling and working. Isn't it more torturing? Perhaps the difference is one can choose to be a vegetarian while one will have to be in the labour force for money. Answering my second question, I just got sick of eating meat, literally.

Most of my friends know the incident which transformed me into a semi-vegetarian. It was my resolution last year but I achieved it this year, with my own will. Since I couldn't sleep, and my mind was switching to its thought factory. I shall write this down as I never phrase my thoughts of becoming a semi-vegetarian into words before. Because I never want to explain myself, if possible.

Firstly, it is due to the fact I was disgusted with myself for acting like a carnivore. When I saw the platter of meat laying in front of me in Tony Romas back in April, I wondered OHMYGOD how many animals have died for my consumption, to satisfy my utility? Oh yes, they are incredibly tasty. But they were born to die where they were killed, skin was peeled, bones were detached, meat was cooked on hot fire with spices, laid on a plate, displayed on the table where consumers were like hungry bears and put them in their fist of stomach.

There are people who hail themselves as animal lovers, pet lovers, etc. Are chickens, cows, lambs, pigs, fishes, ducks, not animals? Just because they are not cute like cats, dogs, hamsters, rabbits? So now there is also inequality in animals, categorised by cuteness or being a pet.

Another discussion about my diet if I take eggs or milk or not. Oh yes, it is my only source of protein and as long as the food does not involve in killing animals, it is edible. Eggs might be regarded as a life in there after a period of time, according to my friend. He related it to a baby in a woman's stomach. I didn't really think or relate to the issue before, because as long as it is not meat, it is fine. The egoistic me wanted to find an answer, that was probably why my thought factory is on, lol.

Well, the question is, if you treat the baby in your stomach as a life, then egg as in the-eggs-you-eat is a life, you are violating your principle. Biologically speaking, if I quote what I remembered learning in form 5, a sperm and the ovum fuse to form a embryo, then a foetus is born. In a real egg form, the eggs-I-eat is an embryo, an embryo is not fully-formed life. The chick in the egg is a foetus, that is life. To sum words up, eating eggs is not killing lives.

My main aim of being a semi-vegetarian, is to consume less meat. There are voices saying 'as if you being a semi-vegetarian will change the world's consumption on meat. C'mon, you are just 1 out of 7 billion people in the world'. I don't attempt to change world, the world is already barely coping with the changes they are facing. Plus I am not that noble. It is a personal choice and I am taking it well, I can't wait for the first anniversary.

I am not sure if in the future, I will adopt to be a full vegetarian. So far the idea of 2-meals-a-week-with-meat works well. But I heard cases that people resume their omnivorous/carnivorous diet after 5 years of being a full vegetarian. So I might give up being a semi-vegetarian, maybe.

I believe things will eventually happen, as long as you have a will, a strong will. My urge to study haven't come along which is bothering me, probably I have a will, but it ain't planting to my mind yet. If one persists on doing something, no one can stop you unless your spirit dampens.


Love,
Wen Xin