Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Connect


Stumbled upon this video and I tried this out. I accepted the challenge and stared into your eyes. It was nothing like the video with a white background but me and the screen with your face. We were apart and I do not know when is the next time we are seeing each other.

It started off with smiles and maybe some exchanges of flirty gazes. It did not even take a minute of gazing for me to be teary. I tried looking away but that was not the rules of the games. Thousands of emotions flooded my head during that 4 minutes. I dreaded for that 4 minutes to pass by so I can hide the ugly face of mine, but it felt like forever.

Finally, I heard the bell. I stormed off the screen and returned to off the screen. I just can't do this anymore. I never heard from you ever since, only when you needed my help. You popped out once awhile on social media and conversations.  I don't usually listen my songs after recording them, with an exception of this last song of you which accompanied me almost day and night.

Sometimes, enough is enough. This has to stop while I work on the other three things I signed up for. It is funny how you said you are going to walk through these three obstacles with me, and now you are nowhere to be seen. A wise friend said:

'They leave when we need them most, they reach their breaking points long before we expect, they don't say what they feel and so we build an image of perfection of who we think they are in our heads. They say something and do the other.'



All in my head,
Wen Xin